Relief

It finally came after months of anxious anticipation, hours and hours of sweaty training, and weeks of paranoid hand washing to make sure I didn't get sick! I crossed the Top of Utah marathon finish line with a Boston marathon qualifying time! For months I tried to imagine what it would feel like to cross that finish line in time to qualify for the Boston marathon. That thought kept me going during the long sweaty hours on the treadmill, and the long suffocatingly hot runs in the humidity of Texas. That finish line moment finally came, and rather than being overwhelmed with happiness like I had pictured so many times in my mind, I was overwhelmed with a feeling of relief. Pure relief. Relief that I made it in time, with 1.5 minutes to spare, rather than 1.5 minutes too late, and releif that I could finally stop forcing my body against it's strongest will to keep going. (My time was 3:38, and I needed a 3:40 to qualify)



I don't understand how one minute I was running toward the finish line, and the next minute I could barely walk. If there was a wheelchair available I would have gladly taken it! It's three days later and I still can't walk normally! I have sore muscles in my feet that I didn't know existed. The pain after a marathon is so hard to explain, but basically it feels like every teeny tiny fiber of muscle in your body is damaged, and if you move too fast or contract those muscles more than the slightest contraction, they will pull or rip.



The happy feeling I had been imagining didn't come all at once, but gradually built up over the next few days as my muscles slowly started to recover, I got some sleep, ate some food, and thought about how fun our trip to Boston and New York will be this April. I felt like the stars had aligned and everything went so well that day in order for me to be able to reach my goal of qualifying. When I think back on how hard that race was and how easy it would have been to miss my time by a few seconds, I know I definitely had help. I think if one thing would have gone a little wrong that day I wouldn't have been able to do it. I had put in the work and preparation for this race and did everything I possibly could to make sure I would be able to run my time goal, but I noticed little things during the race, things I had no control over, like wind to my back for a couple hard miles, that helped give me the little extra push I needed. Thinking about friends and family was also a huge blessing. I really didn't want to give bad news to all the people who had sent me texts or messages on facebook saying they were thinking of me. I'm so lucky to have such awesome and supportive friends and family! Especially Scott. He let me fly to Utah for 10 days while he stayed home all by his lonesome and worked, and now he's happily planning a trip to New York and Boston this April. He's amazing. I can't thank him enough for making the things that are important to me important to him.

I just really love running. I learn so much from it, it makes me stronger, it introduces me to awesome people I wouldn't otherwise know and be friends with, it makes me feel good, it makes me happy, it helps me feel and be more productive, I could go on, but I'll stop there.